SomethingSoWrong
Funniness Negates Wrongness
Wednesday, November 19, 2003
The War
I want to apologize in advance for the lack of humor in todayís dispatch. In fact, I personally think itís the worst dispatch Iíve ever written, and Iíve written some pretty crappy stuff in my time. In fact, donít even bother reading the dispatchÖitís just a lame setup for the pic. And it doesnít make sense. Not one bit. Itís just that I felt obligated to get something up on the site today as lately updates have been somewhat few and far between, what with work and personal life and all being so hectic and fraught with intrigue. Some days I just want to throw in the hat on this whole thing, but I keep at it. To tell you the truth, I havenít really been writing here as much lately as Iím currently working on two novels and after writing on those, I donít have a lot of creativity left for the site. Sad, but true. Oh well, enjoyÖOr at least enjoy the picÖ

The War

Since the United States invaded Iraq earlier this year, Iíve noticed that the public has widely varying views on the war. Some people are all for the killing of innocent women and children while others are not too keen on the idea of thousands of brown people dying. I can appreciate both sides of the issue. After all, whatís more fun than killing innocent women and children? Nothing, except perhaps a day at Six Flags. On the other hand, is it really necessary to kill all these Iraqis? I mean, after all, whoís going to drill for our oil, now that we have reached our objective? Wait, never mind, I just realized that thereís nothing fun about killing innocent people. But sometimes itís necessary if youíre going to obtain your sought-after objective: oil. Oh, and ridding the world of WMD-toting madmen, such as Saddam Hussein. A lot has been made of the fact that weíve been in Iraq for a while now but we havenít found the so-called ďsmoking gunĒ of hidden WMDs. I have a feeling that they are there, but the Iraqis were able to use their superior scientific and technical knowledge to render them invisible. Yeah, thatís itÖsuperior technology. Like sand. And camels.

I think the interesting thing is that no one has mentioned Frank Herbertís prophecies on the Middle East situation as outlined in his novel ďDuneĒ. Spice is obviously oil and the desert planet Arrakis is obviously Iraq. And Paul Atreides is Paul Bremer. Maybe we havenít found the WMDs because our soldiers have been too busy fighting giant sandworms. Or maybe Iím totally wrong and itís just that the Iraqi resistance has much more powerful weaponry than we previously thought, as evidenced by this photo: